Whether you know it or not, everything you do flows from your heart. Our thoughts and attitudes are a product of what’s in our hearts. When we focus on negativity, it causes bad behavior.
When my daughter was younger, I spent a ton of time guarding what she saw and heard. It’s just like bad food—you eat enough of it, and it will kill you. I think we all know that sticks and stones can break our bones, but words WILL hurt us. Words have the power to build or destroy. Said another way, they carry power and influence.
In order to change our lives, our focus must be on things that are true, noble, right, pure, lovely, admirable, excellent, or worthy of praise.
With the help of an eMazzanti associate, Earnie Sap took a long look into the mirror.
Earnie is an angry associate who feels overwhelmed at work. His wife is sick, and his father was just diagnosed with dementia.
Earnie is a big murmurer and complainer. Lately, when talking to his colleagues, he added a bit of gossip into the mix. You might be thinking, “everybody loves a little gossip here and there.”
But what is gossip? The dictionary says that gossip is the act of sharing information, often about other people’s personal lives, that may be private, unverified, or unnecessary. See the dilemma? Earnie knows that something has to change in his behavior — he’s been such a nudnik for so long that people are starting to despise him. When he started working at Zandabar, he brought his subversive behavior with him. People just thought he understood things and had some real information. But as the years went on and people got to really know each other, they realized that he was just a hurting little man. Sadly enough, no one at his company cared enough to put him out of his misery and tell him the truth: “YOU ARE TOXIC!” Oh yes, and there were a few who just loved him. But after overhearing Beth and Joseph in the break room talking about him, Earnie sulked. He couldn’t get mad because, after all, what they were saying was true. He was a know-it-all who at times would sabotage people. He was starting to get sick of himself. Even his dog Ralph is tired of hearing from him. Lately, when the dog sees Earnie coming, he runs and buries his head into the couch pillows.
The next day
Earnie came down at 6 a.m. to walk his dog. Ralph ran into the den and tried to bury his head.
“That’s it,” Earnie huffed. “Cut it out.” Ralph looked up.
“Hey, some peace and quiet for you?” Earnie said sympathetically. Ralph slowly came out and jumped up on Earnie. Earnie fastened his leash and walked out of his house. During the walk, Earnie was starting to get a glimpse of himself. He thought, if poor Ralph is sick of me, I’m in trouble. Earnie had confided in his dog with so much negativity that the dog was looking for a way to cover its ears.
Work
Later that day, during a one-on-one training of Copilot, Earnie vented to an eMazzanti employee.didn’t want to be rude, so he listened to what Earnie had to say.
“Sure,” Earnie said, thinking that Mark would agree with what he had said.
“There are a few things that you need to change in order to get in a better mindset. One, change your diet of gossip. Work is a place for work and nothing else. Now, I get that you have been working for years with these people, but you need to separate the two. If you have a personal problem with someone, that’s your problem.”
Mark continued, “You mentioned that you think Zelda is wearing Dolce & Gabbana and Chanel, and that she obviously is making more than you, and that it’s not fair because she just got there. Did it dawn on you to ask her how she could afford those brands? The answer might shock you. Then you mentioned how your boss is always doting on Benjamin. Well, I know for a fact that Benjamin is one of the most positive and responsive employees that Zandabar has, and honestly, he’s said some pretty nice things about you.”
Earnie’s jaw dropped, and he said, “What?”
“Yeah,” Mark said. “I remember doing a call with him and a group about how to use MXINSPECT, and one of your executives said, ‘Hey, where is Earnie?’ and he said, ‘Closing deals and making money. You can’t put a price on that. Earnie is exempt—he knows how MXINSPECT works, and actually, if you want to save some money, you could have bypassed Mark, who we dearly love, and scheduled Earnie. I have no doubt we would all be laughing and learning.’”
Mark continued speaking.